Tonight, we dine.
Not just any dinner. A very important dinner.
For tonight, we will break bread, share a meal and conversation with the very woman who up until rather recently shared 20 years with the man I now call my boyfriend.
His soon-to-be ex-wife.
Yes. You read that right.
James and I will be having dinner with his soon-to-be ex-wife at her suggestion.
Last week, after their attorney visit to sign paperwork, she wanted to meet up with James and tell him something important. What was important was that she has decided to let all the hatred go. She couldn’t do it any longer. She said that it was simply too exhausting and the energy she expended hating James was poisoning her. She wanted her friend back. She needed her friend again, and she wanted to simply move forward, knowing that he is now sharing his life with me, and that she is sharing her life with someone new as well.
I suppose this may seem rather unorthodox to most, but to us it is the most natural thing in the world.
Well, because regardless of how you may have found yourself in this here and now, life does go on. It really does. You can choose to hate the person or circumstances that put you here, but in the end,
life goes on.
I won’t lie. I won’t say that I’m not a wee bit nervous about the prospect of coming face-to-face with the very person I caused great pain. I represent part of the very embodiment and catalyst of a marriage ending. That’s heavy shit no matter how you slice it.
I have no idea where the conversation will go tonight, and I have no idea how the dinner will end. I hope it ends with more smiles and laughter than tears or sadness. We’ve all had quite enough of that in recent months.
I have also decided to show up about 45 minutes early for a
stiff drink cocktail. I emailed and invited her to join me sans James.